So lately I’ve been thinking of things I’m passionate about. Everyone always says you should follow your passions, right? Well, I feel like I’m not entirely sure what mine are. I know that I love writing and getting lost in the worlds that books provide (hence the combination of my loves appearing on this blog), but sometimes I feel my lack of dedication is a sign of a lack of passion. My lack of eagerness to meet the early morning hours so I can cram a few hours of writing in is just one thing that has me thinking, what am I really passionate about if it’s not writing? Why am I not being dedicated enough to make this shit happen if I love to write? Passion and dedication and faith are the driving forces behind being successful at what you love to do.
I’ve always loved reading. Books were there for me when others weren’t. And when those people were there for me, books were an escape from the stress of being around people–a great adventure while basking in the bliss of being alone. Writing came naturally with that love. The creativity and freedom is what I loved and what I still love. Being able to write or say whatever I wanted to. My characters could be a talking blue bear if I wanted. It was my rules and anything goes.
But right now I need to restart and reboot. I think I hit a wall where I’ve been so bogged down by the “essentials” of everyday life of getting through school, finding a job, and trying to start a career that I’ve lost my passion. I’ve lost that one thing that makes you crazy because you want so badly to accomplish your goal–that secret dream that lies in the center of your heart. So I’m hoping that in the remainder of this year and the next, I’ll be able to find that passion I had as a kid as I read through the library shelves, wrote really bad fictional stories, and was a crazy ball of energy. I’m hoping that the passion will creep back into me.
Maybe I’ll discover new passions or the right passion along the way. Who knows maybe writing isn’t my passion. But for right now writing in this blog and writing in general will hopefully help me pursue a love whether or not it turns out to be a passion.
So I hope I didn’t bore you too much with my thoughts or scare you away. If you happen to stay along for a bit that’s really awesome of you. If you’re just glancing through that’s great too!
Have an awesome day everyone!